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Nirbhaya’s death raised naked questions that need answers

Photo by westconn
Sometimes my heart goes out to Nirbhaya, the victim of gang rape in New Delhi. Though she is dead, I think she continues to live in the hearts of many. The humiliation she had to face and the ultimate grace she attained fill your heart with feelings of hatred, fear and of admiration. This tragic incidence has set me thinking about my own life experiences of gender bias.

Being a boy in a traditional middle class family, I had some privileges that the girls were not supposed to get. At that age, being unaware and ignorant about the individuality, rights, free world and politics of suppression, I didn’t find anything objectionable in such a society. And I continued to live a life of ignorance!

It was not until 10 years ago that the reality hit me. And it still does.

Kids, in their childhood, have no one else but parents talk to and play with. Back then I had this belief that not being available to the kids, is the most disgraceful behaviour you can ever demonstrate to anyone’s existence. Over the years, this belief has turned even more stronger. One must not decide to be a parent, when family is not a priority in anyone’s life.

After, I was blessed with a little kid, in 2002, I decided to free up my time and took up a role that had less responsibilities at work, so as to accommodate the demands of time that being a father had on me. I was usually informed that talked and behaved like a mother. Those days, it confused me and I was too busy in enjoying the company of my new little friend, to bother about such nonsense ideas.

Opinions, usually open the doors to the personalities. With this tragic incident, I often think about the conversations we had on this topic, which impacts the fabric of the nation. This is how the society is designed and that’s where we need to make changes. Hanging convicts will not bear any fruit. Stricter laws will be a deterrent and can only be useful when the nation is policed with 100% police staff without politicians’ interference.

However, few fundamental questions about the woman’s place in the society.

  • Why the woman is expected to look after him?
  • Why she is not expected to get educated?
  • Why, on earth, a father is not expected to change diapers?
  • Why can’t a woman be the main bread earner in the home?
  • Why in a marriage, only men have to work and women don’t?
  • Why early marriage is considered to be the solution to prevent rapes?
  • Is marriage only about sex?
  • Why the leaders of society have repeatedly, time and again, have said that western society influence is responsible for the spread of rapes?
  • How many of the leaders, who say this, have lived in the western countries?
  • Is the western culture only about raping women?
  • Did the rape, never existed in the Indian history? If it never existed and being noticed only in the last 50 years, is it not the failure of the leaders of the society?

While Nirbhaya, is dead, hope her death does not go in vain and we treat women like a human being.

Before it is too late.

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